Threenager

Well, Louisa is indeed a threenager right now. She's defiant and clever and stubborn. Yesterday we both had the day off and I was excited to plant some mums, go grocery shopping, buy her some fall clothes, etc. Fun, easy errands. At the plant shop Louisa was a joy. She thoughtfully picked out pumpkins and grabbed a mum that caught her eye. We planted in our sunny back garden and she happily padded dirt and talked about worms as Teensy rolled around in the dirt we were extracting from the pots. Then we made mac and cheese which she nearly did by herself, stirring the most important ingredient in the world, butter, and milk and cheese powder. She was so so great.

But things fell apart in the afternoon. We went to Whole Foods and she acted like a drunk teenager: slaphappy, incessantly giggly, unruly, and exasperating. I nearly left her in the store. And I was kind of heartbroken after such a fun morning where I thought we had somehow surmounted this behavioral milestone, suggesting more fun, fewer scolds. But of course, fatigue and hunger explain everything. As we drove home, I talked to Carla. Louisa kept interjecting but her comments grew more and more subdued. By the time we pulled into our driveway she was passed out. So I sat in the car, drank my coffee, talked to Carla and enjoyed silence as well as the lack of conflict. She's so wonderful 90% of the time, but the 10%, dudes, it's tough.

Lilo has learned to clap. She still has no teeth and I did spend an hour yesterday googling "symptoms of cerebral palsy". She doesn't do the "so big" pose LJ did. But what she does in response to it, I think, is indicative of her personality. A few days ago, Crysten was over and sitting across the room from Lilo. She shot her hands in the hair and sang, "so big!" But instead of mimicking her, Elizabeth just smiled shyly and turned into my chest. Every time Crysten said"so big", Elizabeth would do the same thing. While she is much chattier than Louisa was at this age, I think she is a bit more hesitant, at least with gross motor skills. But I'll still worry because it's what I was put on this earth to do.

BTW, we bought our tickets for Thanksgiving. Ugh. It's so expensive. I'm so tired of having to fly to see family. I can't wait to live in Minnesota so I can leave my children with my mom or my cousins or my sister and go to a movie. We are there briefly, unfortunately, but enough time to lounge in New Ulm for a few days as my mom and sister play with my children.

Finally, it's the Democratic debate tonight. I've said it before, I'll say it again, 2008 fundamentally affected me and made me realize how, even people, men and women, who proclaim themselves pro-women, pro-choice, liberal whatever are at their core pretty sexist. I kind of couldn't believe it in 2008 and it still pisses me off. I really hope this year is different.